Rejection

This tear I cry, is soley for you. For the future we may not have, for the past that I miss. You may never understand what your friendship meant to me, it was refreshing, and an incredible journey. You requested that I do not miss you, and not to waste my time. The truth is, you deserve so much more... and so do I. It upsets me that you dismissed me so easily, I wish you could see what you are letting go - I am not quite sure you do... if you did this wouldn't be so easy. I know you are hurting, I see it in your eyes. I wish you didn't know that I was hurting too. This situation does not come with a quick remedy, it would take trying to regain whatever we once had. Regardless of the understanding, and my respect for you... it still hurts to not ask anything of you. Seeing you is difficult, responding even harder... saying hi across a crowd won't cut it any longer. I deserve more than the blow off, way more than the rejection, but I know I could never live up to the standard of perfection. The friends I have, are not the small talk kind. It is with great sadness when I read what you implied. I could respect your request, and understand your terms... but when do I get to be selfish, what about my turn? *sigh* your request is too much, to pretend we're ok... I am sorry I can't do it. This is not the way. A true friendship is work, it takes a lot of time. You have to be devoted. An honor to call you friend, but wouldn't it be a lie? I wish I could ask what you think... but again the rejection speaks.